Losing Our Spark: What I’ve Tried to Get It Back

There was a time where I felt more like myself.

I had energy, motivation, excitement and a general happiness for the little things. I laughed more easily. I was social, fun to be around. I felt present in my own life , instead of just trying to survive it.

Somewhere along the way though, it felt like that spark started to fade.

Not overnight. Not because of one big. It disappeared slowly through sleepless nights, responsibilities, stress, heartbreak, self doubt, and the endless pressure of trying to be everything to everyone.

The invisible weight I carried, changed who I once thought I was.

As a mum, partner, daughter, friend, and a person trying to build something meaningful, I found myself constantly pouring from my own cup until there wasn’t much left.

I wasn’t unhappy exactly.

I was just existing.

And I’m sure a lot of other people have felt this way too and I want you to know you’re not alone.

What Losing my Spark Looked Like

For me, loosing my spark looked like:

• Feeling tired, even after resting.
• Losing interest in things I use to love.
• Constantly comparing myself to others.
• Feeling stuck and unsure of who I was.
• Not enjoying the small joys in daily life.
• Going through the motions instead of truly living.

It felt like I was constantly waiting for the magic to return. But it never came.

Feeling like this left me confused. I missed the old me, the way I moved through life so freely. The way I embraced life.

I wanted my spark back, and I was determined to find it again, even if it shined a little differently than before.

What I’ve Been Doing to Get My Spark Back

1- Moving My Body Again

Movement and exercise was something that really helped me after having my daughter. I let it go for a while as life just felt busy. But I missed that version of myself, I missed the feeling after a workout or a walk. It felt like intentional time for myself.

It wasn’t just about weight loss or appearance. It was about my mental wellbeing.

Movement reminds me that I’m strong.

Some days it’s a work out, yoga, or a walk with my daughter. The goal isn’t perfection anymore. It’s simply reconnecting with myself

• Add part about movement and mental health.

2- Creating Something That is Mine

Starting this blog has been a huge part of finding my spark again. Finding myself again.

For years it feels like I’ve poured so much energy into everyone else.

This blog, my writing, it’s something that is mine.

A place to think, create, reflect, and hopefully one day help other people feel a little less alone.

Every post reminds me that, I have something to say, something to offer, and something to reflect on.

3- Spending Less Time Looking At Everyone Else

I’ve learnt comparison is one of the quickest ways to lose joy.

It’s hard to feel proud of your own progress, your own story and your own wins, when you’re constantly measuring it against someone else’s highlight reel.

I’ve been trying to spend less time comparing and more time focusing on my own life I’m building.

I’m learning we all have our own unique stories and no one is better than the other, because they’re all unique to us.

4- Letting Go Of The Idea That I Need To Have It All Figured out

This one is still a work in progress.

I’ve spent so much time constantly wondering if I’m making the right choices.

The truth is, that most of us are all just figuring it out as we go. I like to say it’s all our first time at life.

I’ve stopped waiting until I feel completely confident before taking a step forward.

Sometimes confidence comes after the action.

The more time I waste constantly stressing about having it all together, the more time I miss out on enjoying what I have in the present moment.

5- Appreciating the “Little” Things

A good coffee

A Laugh with a my daughter.

A long phone call with my best friend.

A family event.

A Sunset.

Watching my partner read my daughter a book before bed.

A spontaneous plan.

I’m not sure when all these things starting feeling so ordinary. But realising there not has changed a lot for me.

These little moments show me so many things I am grateful for.

For a long time I thought I needed some huge breakthrough to feel better.

What I’m learning is that life is mostly made up of small moments.

The spark doesn’t need to come back in one big dramatic moment. It can come back in appreciating the daily “little” things that make my life special.

Still Figuring It Out

I can’t say I’ve completely found my spark again. I also can’t say that it will ever return the way it was before.

Im not the same person anymore, life changes us.

But I can say that I’ve found something just important.

Hope.

The belief that my spark hasn’t just disappeared. She’s still there. She’s just needs a little maintence

She’s just been buried under stress, expectations, and the demands of everyday adulthood.

But little by little, I’m finding my way back to her.

And maybe that’s just what life is all about.

If you’re feeling like you’ve lost your spark too, maybe this is your reminder that it isn’t gone forever.

You might just under construction, and slowly you’ll find your way back to yourself.

I’ve realised that finding my spark again doesn’t mean becoming the same person I was five years ago. My spark today looks different. It’s quieter. Wiser. More intentional. But it’s still mine.